Tuesday, March 4, 2008

Relax! It will happen when you stop trying...

Isn't that what everyone says? Or - and here's my favourite - adopt and you'll get pregnant! I've heard it all...and that's why Dear Husband and I don't talk to anyone other than family about it anymore.

I was at a black-tie event on Saturday night and a very nice girl that I sat next to (mother of two) asked if DH and I were going to start a family. I told her, "Yes, we'd love to have kids, when the time is right..." and the lady sitting on the other side of me (also mother of two, bit of a nosey-parker) rubbed my shoulder and cooed "Oooooh, you'd be such a good mother..." But she had this look on her face - like she was consoling me or something. It was a look of total sympathy. And I felt myself welling up. Damn, I hate when that happens (...it all goes back to my last post!! Hits you from nowhere!!)

Anyway, DH and I are "coasting" for these next couple of months, as we had to stop fertility treatments and get my body ready for IVF...so I thought I would forgo the temping and the fertility monitor and just wing it for this cycle. But DH says to me last night, "When are you ovulating?" and I said "I dunno, maybe this weekend!" and he said "Aren't you tracking?" Hmmm...I thought we were supposed to coast this month! So much for relaxing...haha!

I have been doing more reading on IVF...and reading more great blogs from ladies who have been through it. Learning lots. There are a couple of books that I want to pick up too - I just want to make sure that I do everything that I can to make it a success, you know? I know that there are no guarantees, but it freaks me out to think that it might not happen the first go-round...I don't know if DH would want to do it more than once. And truth be told, I don't know if my heart can handle it...

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